I Am the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: An Interview.

The action icon is best known as an iconic tough guy. But, in the midst of his cinematic dominance in the 1980s and 1990s, he also headlined several surprisingly great comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which hits its 35-year mark this holiday season.

The Film and The Famous Scene

In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger plays a undercover cop who poses as a kindergarten teacher to catch a killer. During the movie, the investigation plot serves as a loose framework for Arnold to film humorous moments with his young class. Arguably the most famous involves a student named Joseph, who spontaneously rises and informs the actor, “Males have a penis, females have a vagina.” Arnold replies icily, “Thanks for the tip.”

The young actor was brought to life by child star Miko Hughes. Beyond this role encompassed a recurring role on Full House playing the antagonist to the child stars and the haunting part of the child who returns in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He continues to act today, with a slate of movies in development. He also engages with fans at the con circuit. Not long ago shared his recollections from the production over three decades on.

Memories from the Set

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I don't recall being four. Do you remember anything from that time?

Yeah, somewhat. They're snapshots. They're like visual recollections.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would bring me to auditions. Often it was like a cattle call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, enter the casting office, be in there less than five minutes, deliver a quick line they wanted and then leave. My parents would feed me the lines and then, as soon as I could read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your impression of him?

He was very kind. He was fun. He was good-natured, which I suppose makes sense. It would have been odd if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a productive set. He was a joy to have on set.

“It would be strange if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a huge celebrity because that's what my parents told me, but I had not actually watched his movies. I sensed the excitement — like, that's cool — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was simply playful and I was eager to interact with him when he wasn't busy. He was working hard, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd show his strength and we'd be dangling there. He was incredibly giving. He gifted all the students in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was like an iPhone. It was the hottest tech out there, that iconic bright yellow cassette player. I listened to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It wore out in time. I also received a authentic coach's whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your experience as being enjoyable?

You know, it's funny, that movie was this cultural thing. It was a major production, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, the legendary director, visiting Astoria, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was just released. That was the big craze, and I was pretty good at it. I was the smallest kid and some of the bigger kids would ask for my help to get past hard parts on games because I could do it, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all little kid memories.

The Infamous Moment

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember anything about it? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word provocative meant, but I understood it was edgy and it caused the crew to chuckle. I was aware it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given an exception in this case because it was humorous.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it originated, based on what I was told, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. A few scenes were written into the script, but once they had the kids together, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they refined it on set and, presumably someone in charge came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Give me a moment, let me sleep on it" and took some time. It was a tough call for her. She said she had doubts, but she thought it could end up as one of the most memorable lines from the movie and she was right.